Lonely in a crowd

Loneliness is a feeling, it’s not about being alone. You can be alone and not feel lonely and you can be amongst people and still feel very lonely. Loneliness is not only a problem for (elderly) people living alone in their houses, not having anyone to speak to. It’s also a big problem for teens, twenty- and thirty somethings living their lives filled with activities and accomplishments, but still without a sense of connection and togetherness. People are lonely in relationships, in friendships and in teams. I think this is because we don't share and care enough. Once we start doing that everyone will feel free to speak their minds and hearts, to emote, to connect.

Story

This example easily applies to my own life a couple of years ago. I was then a twenty-something living my life filled with activities and social gatherings. I made sure to fill my time because I couldn’t stand being alone. I felt miserable alone. I thought then that being in the company of others helped me. Looking back I realise this was because I used to completely focus on the other. This was easy for me, I was genuinely interested. But it served another subconscious purpose too. I didn’t have to really look at myself. I didn’t have to share myself. I wasn’t able to properly care for myself. Because I didn’t share and care for myself (all this I ‘gave’ to others), I was feeling lonely quite often. Despite all the social activities I was involved in. After learning to care for myself more and being able to share myself with others, I feel now that I can live in connections with others.